Ditchweed! 5 Smokable Herbs Growing by the Highway to Mellow Your Soul

by Nov 19, 2024Smoke Signals0 comments

Ditchweed! 5 Smokable Herbs Growing by the Highway to Mellow Your Soul

by Nov 19, 2024Smoke Signals0 comments

“They got a ranch they call
Number Fifty-One
They got a ranch they call
Number Fifty-One

You can’t see it at all
‘Less you’re flying by
Just sitting there square
Baking in the sun.”

– The Pixies, “The Happening”

The Pixies’ Black Francis was lyrically hyper-hypothesizing about Area 51, of course, that Top Secret alien research lab the government couldn’t admit was lit until suddenly it was all over Google Maps.

But next time you pop in the Pixies Trompe Le Monde on stun, flying 91 down the Interstate with your feet in the stirrup, realize there are plenty of little hidden herbal Area 51s growing right by the roadside amongst the Mountain Dew trucker piss and carcasses of McyD’s. 

We’re talking ditchweed. Smokable herbs. They’re hidden in the dandelion and ragweed growing right underneath our feet. And yes, they will mellow your soul right down to your lemur skin.

First, a little Surgeon General’s Warning: the herbs that literally grow right by the side of the road are laden with heavy metals, lead, F150 exhaust frost. That shit’s not good for you. If you are going to literally harvest herbs to smoke by the side of the road, pick the herbs at least 30 to 40 feet away from the highway. Our point about ditchweed is this shit grows naturally, abundantly, like weed in a ditch, pretty much. But for the sake of your health, don’t take ditchweed too literally.

Here are 5 smokeable herbs growing by the Interstate, your backyard, that tire pile down by the river where all the teenagers toke their parents’ stash and lose their virginity on Pokemon flannel bedspreads from Walmart’s Classic Christmas line.

Peppermint: A Smokable Herb That Chills

Packing an invigorating minty aroma and a soothing flavor, Peppermint is a smokeable herb you will often find growing right by the side of the highway. Its cooling effect can be deeply soothing and can also alleviate headaches and migraines. Peppermint stimulates blood flow, relaxes the nerves, and can be a great stress reliever. Peppermint has been recognized for its effectiveness in managing Irritable Bowel Syndrome and easing menstrual cramps. Additionally, its revitalizing properties make it beneficial for alleviating symptoms of depression.

Red Raspberry Leaf: a Smokable Herb Great for PMS

 

A gem in the world of organic herbs, Red Raspberry Leaf features a wealth of health benefits, particularly for women. 

Smoking this herb can help alleviate menstrual cramps, offering a natural remedy for those seeking relief from the discomforts of PMS. Historically, it is said that the original concept of cigarettes was inspired by herbal cigarettes made from Red Raspberry Leaves, which Native American women traditionally used during ceremonial practices. 

Red Raspberry Leaves are rich in flavonoids, vitamin A, vitamin C, potassium, calcium, and phosphorus, contributing to their nutritional value. The robust, full-flavored smoke produced by Red Raspberry Leaf makes it an excellent alternative to tobacco, offering a distinctive experience that roots back to ancient traditions. And it grows just about anywhere in the wild, common on footpaths, roadsides, and make-out spots.

St. John’s Wort: the Happy Cartoon Herb

 

Time to get your happy on. Renowned for its mood-enhancing properties, St. John’s Wort has been a cornerstone in herbal medicine for centuries, primarily used to alleviate symptoms of depression and anxiety. The active compounds found in St. John’s Wort, such as hypericin and hyperforin, are thought to contribute to its therapeutic effects by influencing neurotransmitter activity in the brain, fostering a sense of well-being

This perennial herb with bright yellow flowers is highly smokeable and commonly found among roadside weeds and forests. In the herbal realm, St. John’s Wort acts like a dose of Saturday morning cartoons for the inner child in all of us, offering a comforting and uplifting effect. This herb possesses properties that help diminish anxiety and stress, potentially fostering a state of tranquility and ease, particularly valuable for those contending with anxiety disorders or everyday stressors. Additionally, many women have experienced relief from menopausal symptoms, including hot flashes and mood fluctuations, through the use of St. John’s Wort, highlighting its diverse therapeutic benefits.

Wormwood: Smoke the Absinthe Herb

 

Wormwood is the weed of the psychedelic cowboy. It’s most common in over-grazed pasture and rangeland, waste areas, fence rows, and roadsides. Wormwood is renowned for its bitter taste and potent medicinal properties, like Charles Bukowski rolled into a smoke. 

Traditionally used in the making of absinthe, Wormwood is a creative herb that’s inspired its share of artists. But it’s also widely known for its therapeutic qualities. Rich in compounds like thujone, Wormwood is celebrated for its ability to stimulate digestion, enhance bile secretion, and support gut health, making it a natural remedy for digestive disorders such as indigestion and bloating. 

Wormwood: Smoke the Absinthe Herb

 

Native to South America, Yerba Mate can be found growing in the ditches of Florida, Texas, and Hawaii. This herb is celebrated not only for its extensive health advantages but also for its deep-rooted cultural importance. It’s versatile enough to be smoked, although blending it with other herbs is recommended to mitigate its strong impact on the lungs. This vibrant beverage is packed with bioactive components like caffeine, theobromine, and polyphenols, each playing a role in delivering its distinctive benefits to the body. Renowned for its calming effects, Yerba Mate can assist in lowering stress and anxiety, making it a go-to for relaxation and well-being. It’s a great herb to chill out on, relax and decompress.

Smokable Herbs Grow Everywhere

Herbs grow wildly everywhere. Sure, you can buy smokeable herbs wholesale on Bear Blend, grow them in your garden, score them at your local farmer’s market like a jar of local organic honey, but this shit also grows in the wild, in your yard, in the forest, by the side of the highway as you crank your stereo to crazed conspiracy dreams about the government, the CIA, and little green men named Stan. Herbs grow wild – get you some.

Mathew Gallagher

Mathew Gallagher

Wordsmith Specialist

A freelance writer for hire, Matt Gallagher is the face and voice behind Web Copy Magician. He enjoys Bear Blend as a tea to spiritually reconnect with nature and the therapeutic wonders of chlorophyll.

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